Why am I scared to death?

So in 3 days, 16 hours and 48 minutes, I’ll be starting my third half marathon – Grandma’s Half Marathon in Duluth, MN. This is my third one so why am I scared to death?  I ran a hilly and hot 10 mile race 2 weeks ago and finished so what’s my problem. I really wish I knew.

Time…my biggest concern is my time. I don’t want to be slow! Both of my previous half marathon finishes have been under 3 hours. Not much under but still under.  Tulsa was very hilly. San Diego was mostly downhill with a few climbs. Grandma’s is mostly flat. What’s my problem? Lately my runs have been S-L-O-W. And I’ve had a hard time going longer than 4 miles. It’s great that I can run 4 miles but what about the other 9? Ugh. I don’t feel as prepared for this race as I did the first two. I had triathlon training that took up my April and May which meant I didn’t run the long runs like I should have. The only long runs I had were races!

Weather…the first two were in the winter and were pretty much perfect running conditions. Temps in the 40-50s, no humidity and no windy. I do well running in colder weather. Once you get over 50 degrees I start to tank. The forecast for Saturday morning is 55 degrees, 70% humidity and wind from the south at 10-15 mph. I hate humidity and I’m running south into the wind. And you know that 55 degrees is going to warm up really fast.

Support…I’m scared to do this race alone. Eric is running the full marathon so I is just me and the road. Even though we fight about pacing, Eric really gets me through the miles. I won’t have that this time. When I wanted to give up at mile 9, he said no! Keep running! I won’t have anybody to yell at me to keep running! This course is also very lonely as there isn’t much crowd support. When all the fast half marathon runners are gone it will be just me and the other slowpokes. I have a mental problem when I see people walking. I want to walk too. If there were people cheering me on, I’d be less likely to have this problem. But there will be no crowd so I need to fight myself to keep running.

Knock on wood…I don’t think I’ll have a problem finishing it. I just hope I can finish it with a good time. Originally, when I signed up this race, I was hoping for 2:45 time. Now I’m just hoping to finish standing up.